Sometimes Being....

...the cool girl sucks.

I know....you wouldn't think so, right?

You are friends with just about every kind of person, in every different kind of group. You get to know the best of the best. You get some opportunities that many people never even get to think about.

But sometimes it gets old. Right now for instance is one of those days when I feel like it isn't worth it. That maybe for once, it would be nice to 'be like everyone' else. Have a good plan that doesn't rely on networking and chance. Be book smart and attend college, get a degree, and then start a career.

In the end I know that this whole mood really has nothing to do with that, but with other things. I never understand how to talk about it and not sound like I am whining. Whining and complaining are such terrible things in life. They cause doubt and negativity...and those things are so unhealthy.

I just..ugh...can't say it! I just can't be one of those people....and confess everything in written word...well, I can...I just don't want to sound stupid. You know when you know how you want to say something or write something, but when you go to do it...it just doesn't come out the way you want it to at all. And then you never share it, because you don't want to mess with how it is supposed to be....is this making any sense at all?

Oh my brain.